Dirk Nowitzki, my friends, that is why.
This ESPN video explains it all (don't watch past 1:48 because the Bird comparison is ridiculous but pay very close attention to :47. That part is the key).
A beautiful video.
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Today's Calls: Stanley Cup Finals Game 1, NBA Finals Game 1
Stanley Cup Finals Game 1 (Wednesday): Boston Bruins at Vancouver Canucks
Roberto Luongo, riding the energy of the crowd, shuts down the Bruins in net for Vancouver. Vancouver's stars show up as Ryan Kesler plays big and the Sedins team up for a goal. Alex Burrows, being the douche that he is, ices the game with an empty-netter. For Boston, Chara is a no-show and Thomas gets little help from the defense, while the offense fails to get going this game (similar to Vancouver's Game One of the Second Round, where they completely shut down my Predators). Boston's only chance is Tim Thomas becoming Patrick Roy in net and the offense scoring off a crappy deflection of a Chara slapper.
Predicted Final Score: Bos 0, Van 3
NBA Finals Game 1 (Tonight): Dallas Mavericks at Miami Heat
Dirk, fired up for his first game in the Finals in six years, has a whale of a game, scoring over thirty and shooting better than 50%. The Mavericks have a consistent 6-point lead throughout with a few sporadic runs by the Heat, but Shawn Marion keeps LeBron under control and Bron-Bron and Wade fail to find their jumpers. Bosh gets nothing on Chandler and Dirk, and Miami's bench and role players get seriously out-worked by the more determined Mavericks bench. Dirk ices the game with late free throws to stretch the final difference to the 8-11 range and the Mavericks steal a game in Miami for their ferocious owner Mark Cuban.
Predicted Final Score: Dal 103, Mia 92
Roberto Luongo, riding the energy of the crowd, shuts down the Bruins in net for Vancouver. Vancouver's stars show up as Ryan Kesler plays big and the Sedins team up for a goal. Alex Burrows, being the douche that he is, ices the game with an empty-netter. For Boston, Chara is a no-show and Thomas gets little help from the defense, while the offense fails to get going this game (similar to Vancouver's Game One of the Second Round, where they completely shut down my Predators). Boston's only chance is Tim Thomas becoming Patrick Roy in net and the offense scoring off a crappy deflection of a Chara slapper.
Predicted Final Score: Bos 0, Van 3
NBA Finals Game 1 (Tonight): Dallas Mavericks at Miami Heat
Dirk, fired up for his first game in the Finals in six years, has a whale of a game, scoring over thirty and shooting better than 50%. The Mavericks have a consistent 6-point lead throughout with a few sporadic runs by the Heat, but Shawn Marion keeps LeBron under control and Bron-Bron and Wade fail to find their jumpers. Bosh gets nothing on Chandler and Dirk, and Miami's bench and role players get seriously out-worked by the more determined Mavericks bench. Dirk ices the game with late free throws to stretch the final difference to the 8-11 range and the Mavericks steal a game in Miami for their ferocious owner Mark Cuban.
Predicted Final Score: Dal 103, Mia 92
What makes me most sad about sports at this moment
Fernando Torres leaving Liverpool for Chelsea. He was the future of Liverpool, a more storied and beautiful soccer club than Chelsea. He was their star.
Now Torres plays for Chelsea, where he will hide in the shadows of Didier Drogba, Chelsea's star striker for the past seven years.
The worst part of this? Not singing Liverpool's song for Torres anymore:
--- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cpV0ygkmhP4 ---
May this song rest in peace as the best soccer chant in the history of ever.
Now Torres plays for Chelsea, where he will hide in the shadows of Didier Drogba, Chelsea's star striker for the past seven years.
The worst part of this? Not singing Liverpool's song for Torres anymore:
--- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cpV0ygkmhP4 ---
May this song rest in peace as the best soccer chant in the history of ever.
Hottest athlete?
The pantheon of hot women athletes is expansive, excluding lacrosse, golf (except Michelle Wie mmmmm), and the WNBA (college isn't bad, but when those women graduate to the pros...EWWWWWW!!). But many women in this category would not be hot if they didn't play a professional sport. Knowing that a woman could beat the living hell out of me gives her extra bonus points, it's just an inexplicably sexy characteristic. There's something graceful about a chick with potato biceps and thighs like Zydrunas Savickas (Lithuanian World's Strongest Man competitor) that makes me think, "Wow, what a beautiful, strong woman." But the hottest women athletes are the ones who are hot despite being an athlete. My top five are as follows:
5. Michelle Wie (LPGA Tour)- she gets points deducted for making us think she isn't American when she really is.
4. Maria Sharapova (Tennis)- she beats out Anna Kournakova (spelling?) for my tennis nomination because Kournakova's name required me to type it in on the google toolbar. "Sharapova" may look like a hassle, but it's easy when you sound it out.
3. Lindsey Vonn (Olympic Skier)- She receives extra points for getting a gold medal for AMERICA at the 2010 winter Olympics. Lindsey is one of those "big girls." There is something "big" about her. This does not mean that she is fat, or even tall for that matter, she just looks big. But it's hot.
2. Amanda Beard (Olympic Swimmer)- Beard is easily the hottest person at the olympics. One of the reasons I didn't rank her above number one is because of her last name. Reminds me of the fat lady at the freak show. But swimming was the perfect choice for Amanda. She's a keeper (and a gold medalist!).
1. Danica Patrick (Racing)- This wasn't even close. Danica even makes the NASCAR jumper suit look hot. She also gets help from her supporting cast (people that make a girl look better or worse by comparison). Next to all their female counterparts, competitors 2-5 outshine the rest, but not to the extent that Danica does. When you pit Sharapova with Kournakova it's somewhat of a race, but when your best competition is Tony Stewart and Elliot Sadler, you had better put them to shame. And Danica does.
5. Michelle Wie (LPGA Tour)- she gets points deducted for making us think she isn't American when she really is.
4. Maria Sharapova (Tennis)- she beats out Anna Kournakova (spelling?) for my tennis nomination because Kournakova's name required me to type it in on the google toolbar. "Sharapova" may look like a hassle, but it's easy when you sound it out.
3. Lindsey Vonn (Olympic Skier)- She receives extra points for getting a gold medal for AMERICA at the 2010 winter Olympics. Lindsey is one of those "big girls." There is something "big" about her. This does not mean that she is fat, or even tall for that matter, she just looks big. But it's hot.
2. Amanda Beard (Olympic Swimmer)- Beard is easily the hottest person at the olympics. One of the reasons I didn't rank her above number one is because of her last name. Reminds me of the fat lady at the freak show. But swimming was the perfect choice for Amanda. She's a keeper (and a gold medalist!).
1. Danica Patrick (Racing)- This wasn't even close. Danica even makes the NASCAR jumper suit look hot. She also gets help from her supporting cast (people that make a girl look better or worse by comparison). Next to all their female counterparts, competitors 2-5 outshine the rest, but not to the extent that Danica does. When you pit Sharapova with Kournakova it's somewhat of a race, but when your best competition is Tony Stewart and Elliot Sadler, you had better put them to shame. And Danica does.
Monday, May 30, 2011
Who is the Biggest Douche in All of Sports?
It was a close race between:
Every NFL fan for none of us having the courage to punch Roger Goodell right in the pickles. By far the worst commissioner in all of sports (Best commissioner? Dr. Perry Cox (doctor on Scrubs), commish of the More Taste League).
- Jim Tressel, FORMER (hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha) head coach of Ohio State football for writing a book about integrity and honesty and all that jazz and then is involved in a massive scandal that results in his resignation.
- Tommy Amaker, head basketball coach at Harvard for making everyone in the college basketball world believe that his Crimson are the Ivy League powerhouse even though they haven't won the league since nineteen forty-NEVER!!!!
- Bill Laimbeer of the (mostly) Detroit Pistons for constantly talking trash, throwing elbows, committing flagrant fouls, and for being the only white guy on the bad boy Pistons.
- Tim Donaghy, NBA referee for betting on games and reffing them to his liking.
- Every baseball player since 1990 for putting needles in their veins. The only exception to this is probably Matt Bush. Who is Matt Bush you might ask? Matt Bush was the 2004 No. 1 overall draft pick to the Padres who never made it past Single A. Should have done what all the popular kids were doing! Look how well it worked out for Jose Bautista of the Toronto Blue Jays.
Every NFL fan for none of us having the courage to punch Roger Goodell right in the pickles. By far the worst commissioner in all of sports (Best commissioner? Dr. Perry Cox (doctor on Scrubs), commish of the More Taste League).
Why LeBron deserved the 2010-2011 MVP
2010-2011 Regular Season Stats:
LeBron D-Rose
LeBron had the best shooting year of his career so far, surpassing the 50% mark. Rose on the other hand shot a very average 45%. LeBron outrebounded Rose (to be expected) but staggeringly almost notched as many assists per night as the Chicago point guard.
On the defensive side, LeBron locked down the other team's best player every night (guard or forward) which earned him a spot on the NBA's First Team All Defense.
So how did Rose double LeBron's points in the MVP voting?
Postseason:
Let's get this straight, both are great players. But D-Rose is no LeBron James. And this was proven in the Eastern Conference Finals (as I predicted). Bron-Bron consistently stifled Rose on defense and the Bulls had no answer for LBJ's multi-faceted attack on offense. LeBron time and time again hit the clutch shot while Rose failed to rise to the occasion (reminding me of his second half free throw debacle in the '08 NCAA national championship game).
LeBron's stats in the Chicago-Miami series: 26-8-7 on 45% from the field and 39% from three.
D-Rose's stats in the Chicago-Miami series: 23-4-7 on 35% from the field and 23% from three.
It should also be noted that LeBron had fewer turnovers and more steals than Derrick.
The King took over late in games, bringing the ball up the court as a point guard and facilitating the offense masterfully while Rose was crushed by the media by failing to make an appearance in the fourth quarters. Miami waltzed through the series 4-1, leaving the MVP waiting another year for his ring.
So there is why LeBron should have won MVP this year. He played better on offense and defense. Simple as that.
LeBron D-Rose
- Min/G 38.8 37.4
- PPG 26.7 25.0
- Ast/G 7.0 7.7
- Reb/G 7.5 4.1
- Stls/G 1.6 1.0
- FG% 51% 44.5%
- 3FG% 33% 33.2%
- FT% 75.9% 85.8%
- FGA/G 18.8 19.7
- FTA/G 8.4 6.9
- 3FGA/G 3.5 4.8
LeBron had the best shooting year of his career so far, surpassing the 50% mark. Rose on the other hand shot a very average 45%. LeBron outrebounded Rose (to be expected) but staggeringly almost notched as many assists per night as the Chicago point guard.
On the defensive side, LeBron locked down the other team's best player every night (guard or forward) which earned him a spot on the NBA's First Team All Defense.
So how did Rose double LeBron's points in the MVP voting?
- Speedy little guards are more fun to watch.
- The voters always fall into the "This guy already has an MVP, this guy who doesn't had his best year so far, what the hell" (shades of Steve Nash '05).
- A small guy taking it to the bigger guys in the lane always has people rooting for the underdog.
- Defense is always underappreciated in MVP voting.
- Everyone hates LeBron for fleeing Cleveland, where management teamed him with the worst supporting cast in the league (this year was just a testament to how bad Cleveland would have been without James during his tenure). Players are supposed to put themselves in the best position to win championships, and LeBron chose the best possible place for him to do that. HE EVEN GAVE UP MONEY FOR CHRIST'S SAKE.
Postseason:
Let's get this straight, both are great players. But D-Rose is no LeBron James. And this was proven in the Eastern Conference Finals (as I predicted). Bron-Bron consistently stifled Rose on defense and the Bulls had no answer for LBJ's multi-faceted attack on offense. LeBron time and time again hit the clutch shot while Rose failed to rise to the occasion (reminding me of his second half free throw debacle in the '08 NCAA national championship game).
LeBron's stats in the Chicago-Miami series: 26-8-7 on 45% from the field and 39% from three.
D-Rose's stats in the Chicago-Miami series: 23-4-7 on 35% from the field and 23% from three.
It should also be noted that LeBron had fewer turnovers and more steals than Derrick.
The King took over late in games, bringing the ball up the court as a point guard and facilitating the offense masterfully while Rose was crushed by the media by failing to make an appearance in the fourth quarters. Miami waltzed through the series 4-1, leaving the MVP waiting another year for his ring.
So there is why LeBron should have won MVP this year. He played better on offense and defense. Simple as that.
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